The BOWA Blog

Bert Oliva

Waking Up Right

by Bert Oliva

EEEEEEEE!…. EEEEEEEE!….EEEEEEEE!…. EEEEEEEE!….

The alarm clock goes off. Your hand hits the snooze button. What’s the first thought that goes through your mind?

Just five more minutes…

Ugh! How can it be morning already? I have so much to do today…

I’m already late!

Starting our days off with a negative mindset sets our days off on a really negative path. Wherever our mindset is, we tend to attract those kinds of instances and situations throughout the day. When we’re positive, the positivity seems to just flow. And when we’re really negative, everything that can go wrong seems to. Now, many people may say that circumstances and situations are totally out of our control, but our mindsets at least determine how we handle the situations and circumstances that come our way. When we’re positive, a flat tire may be an opportunity to catch up with a friend who gives us a ride. When we’re negative, that flat tire may put us in such a bad mood that we get into a fight with our friend who came to help us. That’s why it’s so important to start the day off right.

Now, I’m human, and I must admit that many mornings my first thought is not “Today is going to be awesome,” but it is usually my second or third thought. I’ve learned to train myself to attract the day I want to have by having a positive mindset.

And then, once I get up, I keep the positivity going by getting myself ready for the day. Have you ever noticed how great your day tends to go when you feel good about yourself? When you take time to get yourself ready, you start your day with confidence and that confidence flows through the rest of your day.

So, whenever possible, take time for yourself in the morning. As soon as you wake up, take a moment and picture yourself meeting the day with grace and ease and laughter. Know that you are going to be a success and have a fantastic day. Know that no matter the challenges coming your way you’re going to face them and overcome them.

Once you have this positivity flowing, take the time and make yourself feel good about yourself in the morning. Dress for the success of your day. Have fun with it and feel good about yourself. You are worth taking this time. And your day will be much better because of it.

Live Life,
Bert Oliva

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17
SEP
0
Bert Oliva

How Are You?

by Bert Oliva

“How are you?” How often do you hear that question throughout the day? How often do you ask it? When was the last time you answered truthfully or really listened?

“How are you?” has become synonymous with “Hello.” In fact, there have been times when I have asked someone how they are and when they start to tell me truthfully, I find myself internally rolling my eyes. Don’t they know they’re just supposed to say “Good and you?” It’s not the beginning of a conversation. It’s just a polite interaction. Right?

Why? Why is it that we can’t take five minutes out of our oh-so-busy lives to truly find out how another person is doing? To connect on a human-to-human level and just listen?

Every single person on this earth craves human connection. In fact, babies get sick if they do not have enough human contact. The same goes with adults. We all need to truly connect with other people. Face to face. Hand to hand. Heart to heart.

I love to travel. One of my favorite things about traveling used to be meeting new people on the airplane. The next time you go to the airport, or anywhere that you have to wait for a bit, look around. It will be hard to find even a single person without some kind of device in their hands. You’ll see even less people engaged in face-to-face conversations.

Though our modern-day gadgets make it simple to get in touch with someone, they keep us out of touch at the same time. Social media is a fantastic way to keep in touch with people and to build new connections, but it is also easy to fall into talking more than you listen. So often it seems we are more concerned with posting that great pic before we forget the funny caption or replying to someone’s status first, than actually having substance to our interactions. Though social media is virtual, the connections can be very real and very valuable, if you invest the time in them.

It’s important to invest time in every relationship. However, in today’s world, it is all too easy to fall into the “too busy” and “I don’t have time” traps. Everyone is busy. Everyone has a lot of stuff to do, but everyone also needs to hear “How are you?” from someone truly ready to listen to them once in awhile too.

Live Life,
Bert Oliva

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16
SEP
0
Bert Oliva

Shamless

by Bert Oliva

Two summers ago, my family and I were on vacation in Venice and my then 14-year-old daughter got up in front of a crowd of complete strangers and sang a song. Not so well, I might add. But the fact that she did it, unprompted, and completely unabashedly, made everyone in the crowd cheer for her. I could not have been a prouder father had she been graduating from Harvard Law Summa Cum Laude. Why? Because she was completely herself and was shining at her brightest.

It seems ironic as we age and technically “come to know ourselves” more we actually lose a lot of ourselves to shame and shyness. With responsibilities and bills, so-called “respectfulness” and “propriety” seem to set in. We start worrying about “who might see” and “what will they think.”

Who is this amorphous “they”? Who is this all-knowing judge sitting at the sidelines of our lives judging every step we take?

Everyone judges everyone. All of the time. And honestly, most of the time, when people are judging you it is because they are jealous that you had the guts to go out and do something they did not. So, if you’re going to be judged anyways, shouldn’t you at least have fun?

Oftentimes, the biggest judge is actually us. We hold ourselves back because we are embarrassed or we don’t want to make fools of ourselves. But how often do we hold ourselves back from having the time of our lives?

I am an incredibly shy person. A shy professional speaker might seem like an oxymoron, but it’s the truth. In my everyday doings, I am quiet and reserved. So when I saw my daughter singing to the world with all her might, not only was I proud of her, she taught me something. She reminded me that the most important part of life is enjoying it. And you truly can not enjoy it if you are always worrying what other people think. Just be yourself and sing loud and proud. Those who love you will love you more, and those who judge you will be jealous of the fun you’re having.

PowerTools™
1)The next time you immediately find yourself saying “No” to an opportunity even though somewhere inside you want to say “Yes,” take a moment to breathe.

2) Ask yourself “What’s the worst that can happen if I say ‘Yes’?” Usually, the so-called consequences are not much. Perhaps a little embarrassment, if that.

3) Now ask yourself “Will I regret it tomorrow if I say ‘No’?” Life is too short for regret. If you will have even a little regret tomorrow, you should definitely take a chance and go for it.



Live Life,
Bert Oliva

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15
SEP
0
Bert Oliva

Excuse Me…

by Bert Oliva

Life gets overwhelming for all of us at times. This past month has been particularly hard for myself and my team. We’ve been so busy with events and various personal obligations that we’ve let some of the “little” things slide: a daily journal entry…exercise…even this newsletter.

We all had excuses as to why we’d let some things slip through the cracks and they are extremely valid: Alexa’s surgery, Val’s grandmother, my children going back to school…

However, to be truly successful, no excuse, no matter how valid it may be, is acceptable. If you want to succeed, you must hold yourself to a higher standard.

Remember, it’s doing all the small little details right every time that makes you a success. Excellence doesn’t happen once. It happens always.

If you’ve been excusing yourself away lately, stop it. It’s time to get back on your routines and get your commitments done. You are worth too much and have too many talents to hide them away under a pile of excuses.

Live Life,

Bert Oliva

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11
SEP
0
Bert Oliva

The Path Less Traveled

by Bert Oliva

In today’s world of texts, Snapchats, Instagrams, and so much more, communication time has been reduced to microseconds. Everything we do nowadays is at such a fast and furious pace we hardly have time to breathe or take time to make decisions.

Moreover, in this day of instant communication and instant gratification, our patience level on a whole has been greatly reduced. At least I know it has been for me. When I was younger, I enjoyed waiting for letters in the mail; now email is too slow and if you haven’t responded to my text within a minute or two, I’m annoyed and wondering if something is wrong. Can you relate to this feeling?

I think a lot of this high-speed philosophy of our modern age has also seeped into the way we work and the way we think about work. Oftentimes, I find myself thinking, “There has to be an easier way. A way of less resistance. One where I can get what I want now and I don’t have to work for it.” And the truth of the matter is, in today’s world where nearly every ounce of humankind’s knowledge is available to us from a single mobile search, there probably is. At least, there’s a shortcut to seeming like we’ve gotten to where we want to go.

For instance, there is so much knowledge out there on being a great soccer player, that I could easily learn the terminology, the plays, and even some of the theory behind the sport in probably a matter of a week. But sounding like a soccer player won’t give me the ability to actually play the game as months, or better yet years, of physical practice and whole-hearted dedication will.

The path of least resistance is not always the best option. In fact, it usually isn’t. Not when it comes to something that truly matters; something that we want to master. Though you can gain knowledge at an instant, it is only through true experience and personal application of that knowledge that we master it and it becomes our own.

QUOTE THIS: “If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.” -Frank Clark



PowerTools™
1) The next time you find yourself wanting something to be easier, ask yourself if what you are trying to achieve is worth having. Is it something you truly want?

2) If this is something you truly want, then envision yourself achieving it. Close your eyes or write down in your journal exactly how you will feel and where you will be when you achieve it. Will you feel accomplished? Will you be proud? Will all of your hard work have paid off? Who will be with you? Make this vision as complete as it possibly can be for yourself.

3) Now that you have this complete vision of this goal, is this a place that you can get to instantaneously or by taking shortcuts? Even if you could skip ahead and be there already, would the accomplishment feel the same without all the hard work that went into it? Realize that the only way it will truly become your achievement and a worthwhile one is through your hard work and persistence, take a deep breath, and then take one more step toward your goal. You will get there. And the accomplishment will be all yours.

Live Life,
Bert Oliva

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18
AUG
0
Bert Oliva

This Is The Week!

by Bert Oliva

This is the week where the relationships you have wanted to rekindle or strengthen start happening.

This is the week where you are opening your eyes and viewing things in a way you have not in a very long time.

All success begins with a positive mindset. If you are not in a positive mindset, you are setting yourself up for failure and a lot of pain and disappointment. Stop. Make this your week.

I read an article recently by Marwan Jamal entitled “10 Things Highly Productive People Don’t Do.” It’s an excellent read. Though I love the entire list, my favorite is “3. They don’t sabotage themselves.” Everyone is human and everyone is not “perfect” or as productive as they can be every day. The difference between highly productive people and less productive people is that those who are highly productive do not beat themselves up over their mishaps. They simply focus on the positive and move forward.

This is the kind of positive mindset we should all strive for this week. Stop self-sabotaging. Stop focusing on the bad and start focusing on what is coming to you this week. Foster a deep belief within yourself that everything is coming together for you. Focus on what you are attracting. The good things, events, and people that are coming into your life. This is your week.

PowerTools™
1) Train Your Brain: One of my favorites tools that I use personally to help me focus on the positive and keep my mind open to attracting the good things in life are affirmations. An affirmation is a positive phrase you repeat to yourself which describes how you want to be. The idea behind this is that you focus your mind on these positive thoughts, curbing your negative thoughts. And the more you focus on these positive thoughts, the more you will attract positivity into your life. Make a list of three affirmations for yourself. They can be as simple as “This is my week,” “I am confident,” etc.

2) Write It Down: Write these affirmations down on at least 3 cards and place them in various areas where you will see them often: your bathroom mirror, in your car, in your desk drawer at work, etc.

3) Repetition is Key: Every time you see one of these cards, repeat your affirmations to yourself. If possible, repeat them out loud. Our words are incredibly powerful. And the words we speak aloud even more so. Every time you speak your affirmations, feel yourself already acting or being what is on your card. Know that you are attracting positivity in your life.



Live Life,
Bert Oliva

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11
AUG
0
Bert Oliva

Words To Live By

by Bert Oliva

Times are tough. Everyone is struggling with something. Bills. Illness. Stress. So much more.

All of these things linger in the backgrounds of our minds and cause us to second-guess ourselves. They distract us and shake our faith.

This loss of faith can be very subtle. You keep taking every step. Making every call. Doing everything you are supposed to do, but not with the right energy, so you don’t get the right results. Subconsciously, you’re waiting to fail. You’re self-sabotaging.

Worse yet, these background distractions aren’t going anywhere. There will always be another bill, another to-do, another unwelcomed surprise.

It’s time to change our focus from the background to the foreground. It’s time for each of us to come from a united knowing, an absolute certainty, that utter success, stability, and everything else we each want is coming to us.

Instead of questioning why you are here in this place and what you did to deserve this, look at it from the other perspective. It’s amazing where you are right now. Look at everything you have accomplished. Look at the skills you have polished and learned.

The fact that you have survived everything you have gone through, especially with all of your self-doubt, is amazing and speaks to your character and also to God’s plan for you. Lesser people would have given up by now.

Stop making excuses and stop looking for quick fixes. Create your goal, one single goal, and focus on it. Do it positively, with certainty, and without doubt, and you will achieve it.

Work on creating an atmosphere of positivity around you, of attracting success. Start looking at each of your tasks not as stresses, burdens, or futile things that won’t work, but rather as building blocks—stairs that you are climbing to bring success in.

Now is not the time for hope. It’s the time for faith. Faith in the world, in your team, in yourself. Failure is not even a possibility.

PowerTools™
1) Write down what is in the background of your mind. Any worries or stresses your subconscious mind may be putting attention to. Oftentimes simply writing down what is on your mid will bring you clarity and help you to realize not everything is as bad as you have made it out to be.

2) If there is anything that you can do to lessen the burden of these worries, do it. Stop putting it off. Take action. If you can not take action right now, allow yourself to put these items on hold for the moment. Do not put any attention towards them until you have accomplished what you need to do today.

3) Now that your background distractions are literally out of your mind, it’s time to focus on the here and now. What do you need to do today? Do not set yourself up for failure. If you have been struggling to accomplish all of the tasks you have set for yourself each day, cut down the number of tasks, etc. Or split larger tasks into to smaller, easier tasks. This will set you up to achieve, which will put you in a positive state of mind.



Live Life,
Bert Oliva

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28
JUL
1
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