The BOWA Blog

You Are The Responsible One!

by Bert Oliva

There are times when you think that the world has not met your expectations, times when you judge the world and everyone around you.

But what happens when the world judges you? Do you need validation from others to get through your day? Do you wait for someone to notice your haircut, your new watch or your fast car?

Well, I have news for you, you don’t need validation form anyone but yourself. You need to evaluate your goals, your dreams, your accomplishments and see how and where they align. You need to validate you.

You need to tend to your own needs and make sure you follow up, do the work and make it happen, rather than wait for your loved ones, or friends to think about getting it done for you. When you really want something done in your life, you need to get up (G.O.Y.A. = get off your assets) and get it done.

Whatever the outcome of your efforts are, they are yours, good or bad. But when you really give it your all and fail, if you did not get the results you wanted, know that it just was not time.

But when you do make continuous strides toward the end goal, you eventually get it. Just be aware not to give up too soon, sometimes, it is that one extra push that makes it over the hurdle. And you have the power to do it if you have the desire make it.

And when you do make it, you do not need validation, just some friends for the celebration!

Until next time.

Thank You

by Bert Oliva

What are the things that you truly appreciate in your life?

Do you normally take time to show appreciation to those closest to you? Presents do not have to accompany your actions, a simple dish, a sticky note in an unexpected place or even a handwritten note. There are so many ways to show someone that you appreciate them, even a simple unexpected lunch break can make someone’s day shine.

For those that seem to forget that really minuscule things can show you appreciate someone, here are some simple suggestions:
1) Do something without asking
2) Finish a chore for them
3) Prepare a bubble bath
4) Dedicate a song
5) Send a text message
6) Fill their tank with gas

For those of you in serious relationships do not forget that women need to feel appreciated in order to show appreciation for their men. Appreciation shows the other person that you value them. In this hectic world it is nice to think someone can do something nice for you and feel valued for it. But of course doing something nice for someone is rewarding in itself for you, do not expect something in return. Just like property, increasing someone’s self worth is value added to someone’s life.

Until next time.

The Power Of Smiling

by Bert Oliva

A 2010 Wayne State University research project that examined the baseball card photos of Major League players in 1952 found that the span of a player’s smile could actually predict the span of his life! Players who didn’t smile in their pictures lived an average of only 72.9 years, while players with beaming smiles lived an average of 79.9 years.

We are actually part of a naturally smiling species. We can use our smiling powers to positively impact almost any social situation. And smiling is really good for us.

Surprisingly, we’re actually born smiling. 3-D ultrasound technology now shows that developing babies appear to smile even in the womb. After they’re born, babies continue to smile (initially mostly in their sleep) and even blind babies smile in response to the sound of the human voice.

A smile is also one of the most basic, biologically uniform expressions of all humans. Paul Ekman (the world’s leading expert on facial expressions) discovered that smiles are cross-cultural and have the same meaning in different societies. In studies he conducted in Papua New Guinea, Ekman found that members of the Fore tribe (who were completely disconnected from Western culture and were also known for their unusual cannibalism rituals) attributed smiles to descriptions of situations in the same way you and I would.

Smiling is not just a universal means of communicating, it’s also a frequent one. More than 30% of us smile more than 20 times a day and less than 14% of us smile less than 5 times a day. In fact, those with the greatest superpowers are actually children, who smile as many as 400 times per day!

So now we know that:
When you smile, you look good and feel good.
When others see you smile, they smile too.
When others smile, they look good and feel good, too.
So now, whenever you want to look great and competent, improve your marriage, or reduce your stress…or whenever you want to feel as good as when you’ve enjoyed a stack of high quality chocolate without incurring the caloric cost…or as if you randomly found 25 grand in the pocket of a jacket you hadn’t worn for ages… or when you want to tap into a superpower and help yourself and others live longer, healthier happier lives…SMILE.

Until next time.